My Life Abroad: The Adventures of Two Birds
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Tue
4
Aug '09

Hanging In…

It’s been a difficult road for me.  I believe that because everything has happened so quickly, and this disease was such a suprise it has really taken it’s toll on me physically and emotionally. 

I’m so ready to get back to work… things just keep delaying my return.  Sunday I started hearing something in my lungs, fluid, or something else.  I’m quite scared to hear something like this after the surgery.  I had to have Rod take me to to the Emergency Room to see my doctor there – additionally I wasn’t able to keep any food down for a couple days.  My doctor believes the chermotherapy drugs I’m having to take causes some nausea here and there.  They did do an x-ray and have told me that I have pleurisy which is that the lung I had surgery on is rubbing against my body which is causing that sound I’m hearing and feeling as well.  The drugs I’m on should help to heal the pleurisy and well… another week of healing something else.

My hand is still bandaged, we have to change it every couple days.  It will be bandaged for weeks still. It’s very difficult to even look at my finger – missing.  It almost looks invisible.  I still feel the missing part of my finger, quite often it itches snd sometimes I get a pain.  If I’m being completely honest, this is definitely going to be the most difficult part of this disease.  I’m still suffering from numbness and some pain in the tips of the majority my fingers, which I may become acustom to after a while should this persist.  I have tried 5 sessions of the plasma pheresis in an effort to help the circulation.  I suppose my biggest fear is to lose another finger, the numbness certainly doesn’t help this fear.  The treatment hasn’t really helped my fingers and it’s meant that I’ve had to have several blood transfusions in the process.  Not happy about this either – not a fan of taking the blood of strangers into my body, even though it is checked throughally, I worry that my body won’t accept the blood, make me sicker, oh there are a million reasons.

Moving on, and that’s what I must do – I’m hanging in there.  Thanks for your prayers and positive words – it all helps.  I am thankful for all of you, my friends, and all of the time you’ve taken to be there for me.  Individually, your friendship is something I will not forget.

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