My Life Abroad: The Adventures of Two Birds
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Dec '10

Beverly Pando

bev.jpgThis month has been a somber one, my Godmother Bev passed away on November 24th after struggling with Cancer.  This really brings up so many emotions for me and my immediate family… and after going through a similar situation with my father some 13 years ago, all I can think about is how Bevs children and and husband are suffering right now.  It’s something you never want to go through, losing a parent, and I am just crushed that Lisa and Anthony will have to go through this type of pain.

Bev has been around since before I was born, she was at one time married to one of my Dad’s best friends and mates from high school. Don and Bev were both named my Godparents back in April 1970, and we had remained in close touch over the years. We spent time growing up around their children Lisa (a little younger than me), and Anthony (a little younger than my brother) – and closer to junior high/high school we actually lived under the same roof for a short amount of time. Similarly, we were like family in many ways – Bev’s cousin married my cousin after meeting at a party at our house… we definitely were an extended family.  My parents were lucky to have such great school friends that remained adult friends and are still friends to this day. 

It was only a several months ago I heard of Bev’s struggle and I was making plans to visit Bev when we come home for Christmas (in a matter of days now), unfortunately I am so saddened to hear that her life was cut short, but thankful that the pain she endured is now over and that she is at peace.

I hope that Bev’s family can find peace too.  It’s taken me a long time to find it myself, and I don’t even think that I’ve fully accepted that my Dad is gone. Even after 13 years I still think about him every day of my life, I still have a good cry every once in a while, I still talk to him and look at his picture as not to forget.  I think that’s all you can do really. Be thankful for your family, and especially your parents.  The love of a parent is something you can get nowhere else. Lisa you are so lucky to have found your true love, and shared your child with your Mother before she passed, I know those must have been the brightest days for her.  It’s something I will forever regret for myself.

If you are going to lose someone don’t take the time you have left for grantite, be sure to say all the things you want to say to that person. Take time off to be with them a little bit longer, if you take the time it will be for them and for you.  Don’t look back and say I wish I could have.  Hold their hand, tell them that you will be okay after they are gone – that’s all my Dad wanted to hear.  And even if you don’t think you will be okay… you will.  Time heals all wounds. 

Lisa and Anthony, I am so sorry for your loss.  I am so sorry that you have to feel the anguish of losing your Mother.  I hope that you can be there for each other and lean on each other.  Don’t shy away from talking about your Mom every chance you get, it may make you cry but those are tears of love and you need to shed them.  I love you both.

I love you Dad.

I love you Bev.

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